You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
So squirting runs in the family.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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