Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
