You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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