oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
