oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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