he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
