The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
