He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
