I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
