I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
you're hired as official boob wrangler
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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