This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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