I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
