What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize