i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
