Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize