..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
