belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize
