Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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