ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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