i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
