no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
