I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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