New invention idea: vibrating tampons
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
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