do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
