Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
