I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
