At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
