Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize