TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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