The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Randomize
