Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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