Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Randomize