What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
