if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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