there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize