i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
