i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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