38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
