My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
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