elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
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