i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
