What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
