You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
