Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
