Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
