oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
