Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
