Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Pappa wants mamma naked
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
