too bad you live with your parents still
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
