I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
