Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
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