brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Shame - the story of my life.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
