So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
